Cultural Shock

Its been long since I found some time to write. Unlike everytime, this post takes its place almost suddenly. Some events around here triggered this post.

Ever since I landed in USA, people asked me various questions like, "how do I like the country?" , "how is the weather? , the culture, the infrastructure etc etc.
Amongst other such questions, the one that every person in US asked me was "Did you have a cultural shock?" and my answer to it was always NO. This somehow amused people, some had a look as though I knew everything about America, few gave me a foolish look and some others made fun of me stating I haven't seen real America and there were few who themselves were in a so called shock for having to use paper instead of water. According to me there are few things every civilization does in a certain way, in this era of knowledge sharing and IT, I, personally feel such little things are very well known to a person who wants to enter US or for that matter any other part of the world.

Well, I respect these people's feelings, may be I haven't seen too much of this country but there was no shock in its essence what so ever. Few terminologies were different, the twang was different but apart from that nothing.
But yeah recently something happened that really blew me away, made my heart sink and it was a real SHOCK, yes a cultural shock to me.

here goes the story...

A few Sunday's ago we (my husband and I) were on our regular India call. After talking about the routine stuff Suyog's dad broke a news that some one from their society (community as you may say here) expired whom Suyog happened to know well, his dad mentioned to us that the entire society was in grief and many people actually did cry over his death. The entire community of around 60 + apartments gathered before that person was to be cremated. Suyog too kept feeling bad for another day or two, which was obvious.

Now this is routine in India, nothing really worth mentioning over a post which speaks about sudden shock.

On a past Saturday (22nd Aug 2009), we were busy preparing for the Ganesha festival. While passing by I saw an office staff cleaning the apartment of my neighbour. My neighbour was a old lady named "Virdeen" who often needed help in cleaning and the stuff. She was a nice lady and used to sit besides her apartment window making jewellery (yeah she sold imitation/fashion jewellery) or playing some game. We often waved at each other, enquired about each others health and bid goodbye. Occasionally, we have even chatted for like half an hour, which my husband said was very unusual in US but it hardly mattered to me and she was a sweet lady.

So I asked this office staff, who was cleaning her apartment whether she was helping Virdeen out and very casually and calmly she came out and told me that Virdeen had passed away like 2 weeks ago. This really shook me from within. Further she mentioned that Virdeen had to be cremated by the office staff because she was the only child and never married, they even tried contacting Virdeen's cousins who denied to take up her responsibility due to the heavy expenses for burial and the stuff. This tore me apart, made me numb and yes it was a cultural shock to me.

Poor lady had no-one to cry over her death, I, being a neighbour, came to know about the news after 2 weeks, that too because of my inquisitive nature and since she was a good friend to me. This thing kept disturbing me. I have to pass her apartment to reach mine and everytime I look at the empty window I feel bad really bad. I feel sick to my stomach about the culture here, prosperity and money cannot buy you love, I had heard it all the time, read it all over and now I have seen it materialise.

This country who claims to sensitive about 9/11, terrorist attacks, etc does not care about their own people. Media celebrates the death of their pop star, their politician, people cry, tweet, sms, etc over the death of these celebrities but forget to mourn even for a minute for their own relatives.

This is America, now I know.

And yes, I have had a cultural shock, definitely a big one.